Whose?

I am trying to understand her
I would like to know both
What she should hear
For that much she wants to believe
I am afraid of this silence
And the gap between us
From these statements of absence
Who put me in the knee
I lost my reason
Let me to the abandonment
I look back
I see a tear sinking
I lost my benchmarks
The color of my soul
Tell me where is my life
If she is “far” from here?